Thoughts From My Last Days In England

I fly back to America on Saturday. I can't stop it and it is all coming too fast. My face has been leaking tears every time I turn around. Honestly I can't stop it and it is getting annoying. I don't normally cry. It is odd and foreign to me. I don't like it.

Saying goodbye sucks. Like not in the "oh gee that kinda stinks" kind of way but in the "Oh my Lord I think my heart is being ripped from my chest and I might actually die" way. I didn't think it would be this hard. Not only for me. My kids have now realised their world is going to be flipped upside down as well. They're not keen. Seeing my daughter cling to our neighbor and tell her that she loved her and that she would miss her terribly was one of the hardest things I have had to witness. There are no words to say how much it kills you as a parent to rip your child's world out from underneath them.

Appointments for everything. I think I need to schedule in restroom breaks. I have barely had a moment to myself. Not that I want to be alone, because that is when my face starts that pesky leaking.

So, we have 2 and a half days left in the UK and my heart hurts. I am going to miss my life here. I am trying to find positive things to dwell upon, but it is hard when your whole soul is screaming to stay. I will miss you England. I will miss your people, your rain, your wind, your rolling hills, your flat bits with no trees, your history, and your wit. I am going to miss you and a piece of my heart will always reside here.